What I wouldn't do for a chance with you.

There is nothing else I want more than to have a chance with you. You, who has become unattainable. I'm going off to college soon. We'll go our separate ways and never see each other again. I just want a chance to be happy for at least a little bit. You know?

It's kind of funny how much I still like you. We've been through a lot, maybe not together but we've been through a lot. I really want to try this thing out but can I ever act on it? No. I am not that type of person. That is why you have to make the move. You have to be brave, but I don't even know if you like me anymore or if you ever did at all.

I wish for us to try this thing out but it probably won't work out. We've tried before, at least being friends but one of us ruined it and it was probably me. *sigh* This is who I am. I am quiet. I will never make the first move. I am shy.

This is me, a girl who like you. Who likes you a lot actually. Who has liked you, a person that she doesn't even know, for a really long time. Who has always wanted to see what it would feel like to be with you but has never actually acted on it. How can I when your presence shoots my nerves and make me a nervous wreck. I can't even talk. You're always at the top of my chat list but I never click your name.

I don't know. Some people may ask how I can like you when I don't even know you anymore. Maybe I just like the idea of you. I know that sounds weird. I may just be insane, but you've always been a presence in my life. You've always been someone I can fall back onto. No matter how much I strayed to other people (and believe me, I have) there is always you that I can always go back to liking.

I don't know. I just don't know what draws me back to saying I like you again and again and again. It's weird. Maybe once we go off to college, I will give up on the idea of you. On the idea of being in a relationship with you because you have no idea how bad I want to try. I want to unravel what makes you you. You're a mystery to me.

I don't know. This is stupid. I'm stupid. Forget that I ever said anything. I'll just go back to admiring from afar and having these sad moments when all I want is you.