Rebound?

Well, I think I've come to the conclusion that no matter who I like next, they will be like a rebound. It's been over a year since my ex broke up with me and yet I just can't find the will power to forget about him.

I want another relationship so badly because I miss the feeling of having someone else there for me. I miss all the hugs and kisses, not necessarily from my ex because I am NEVER getting back together with him.

Today, I realized that (probably, I don't really know) the reason I went out with him was because he gave me attention, unlike every other guy that I have even had any interest in. The guys that I have ever been interested never talked to me or anything and I ended up pining after someone who would never give me a chance. I guess I'm re-evaluating everything and that is the conclusion that I've come to.

If the guy I liked actually gave me a chance then I would have never dated my ex and I wouldn't be so desperate for another relationship (because frankly, I am desperate to feel loved again). I'm really in the mood where I feel so alone and I will always be alone. Meh. I am such a complainer. I wish for things but I never have the guts to make them happen.

I guess that makes me a complete social defect. I never have the nerve to do anything. I am always too afraid to talk to that cute guy or to talk to the guy I like. I pine for them from afar and expect them to make the first move because for some reason I feel like they would never feel the same way and if they did then they would make the first move.

I'm just not happy with myself at the moment. I'm always tempted to go up to the person that I do like and just tell him how I feel, but nope. I never do. It's quite sad actually.