Here is part two.
52. Are you nice to everyone?
Depends on the person you ask. To some people, I am too nice. To others, I am mean. To myself? I don't really know.
53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Totally did not expect to like a lot of people that I did like but whatever.
54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
Ummm.... considering I was in a relationship with a guy for 15 months without cheating..... yeah.
55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
Yes, yes I am. I am very good at this.
56. Do you think you like someone?
Honestly? I don't really know anymore.
57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?
My baby cousin's name is Jenna but that probably doesn't count.... so no
58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?
Neither. I don't really like people in general.
59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?
Yeah, I think in 7th grade and then last year around april.
60. Do you hate anyone?
I hate everyone.
61. How’s your heart?
Broken.
62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?
Yeah, a lot of things actually.
63. Have you ever cried over a guy?
Duh. I'm a girl.
64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?
I don't know.... everybody? to be realistic, probably nobody because very few people notice me.
65. Are your toenails painted pink?
No. They used to be painted red but now they're super chipped.
66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?
I hope not.
67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?
I guess. I don't know. depends on why they're crying.
68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?
no.
69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?
My mom.
70. How do you look right now?
like a freaking slob.
71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?
Honestly? No.
72. Can you commit to one person?
Yes, yes I can.
73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
No, not anymore.
74. Have you ever felt replaced?
Yes, a lot actually. It's really easy to replace me.
75. Did you wake up cranky?
Today? No.
76. Are you a jealous person?
Yes, yes i am.
77. Are relationships ever worth it?
I don't know anymore.
78. Anyone you’re giving up on?
Yeah, kind of sad actually but yes.
79. Currently wanting to see anyone?
No, I kind of hate the world at this moment.
80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Work.
81. Last person you cried in front of?
does myself count? If not.... probably one of my best friends.
82. Is there someone you will never forget?
Yeah, I probably won't forget him. You know how it is with first love.
83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?
No, not at all.
84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?
Freaking out because it probably won't ever happen.
85. Are you over your past?
Honestly, no I am not.
86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?
I don't have best friends of the opposite sex.
87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?
Yes, one person.
88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
I don't know. I honestly don't know. He hurt me a lot and I don't know if I can ever trust him again. What is a relationship without trust?
89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?
No, hell no. My parents would kill me if he ever knocked on my door at 3am. Heck, I would kill him if he did that.
90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
Yeah. They didn't hate him at first though.
91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?
Probably not. I'm a loner.
92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?
Yes, my boss's son's name is Michael.
93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?
Nope. I've only ever kissed one guy.
94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?
This january? Nope, wasn't in a relationship.
95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?
Nope. When am I ever happy with the person I like? Do I even like anyone anymore?
96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?
YES, absolutely gorgeous. She's my best friend and she's awesome.
97. Who do you have texts from?
Friends
98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
I would be heart broken. One the outside I would be like "fuck you, I don't need you" but on the inside I am really like "what's wrong with me?"
99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
Yup.
100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?
My bestest buddy.
101. Ever kissed under fireworks?
hmmm...... I don't think so.
102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?
Yes.
So many questions.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Deep Ass Question #4
4. You are at the doctor’s office and he has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? What do you do with your remaining days? Would you be afraid?
I would tell the people closest to me about it because I want them to prepare and spend as much time with me as possible. Then I would do one of those kickstarters or something like that so I can get money and live out my dream before I die. I want to travel all over asian. I want to be thrown into the middle of hong kong, seoul, or tokyo and just live. I want to be surrounded by strangers. Once I get my fill of traveling, I would fly back home and spend my last moments with my friends and my grandma because those are the people who've been through a lot with me.
Would I be afraid to die? Would I really? I think everybody is afraid to die to some extent, but knowing that my time is up and getting to do what I want, would I rally be afraid to die? I don't really know. I guess if I really think about it, death is just another thing to experience. It's the final frontier that can't ever really be explored. I guess I would be afraid, but I guess I would also be ready as well.
I would tell the people closest to me about it because I want them to prepare and spend as much time with me as possible. Then I would do one of those kickstarters or something like that so I can get money and live out my dream before I die. I want to travel all over asian. I want to be thrown into the middle of hong kong, seoul, or tokyo and just live. I want to be surrounded by strangers. Once I get my fill of traveling, I would fly back home and spend my last moments with my friends and my grandma because those are the people who've been through a lot with me.
Would I be afraid to die? Would I really? I think everybody is afraid to die to some extent, but knowing that my time is up and getting to do what I want, would I rally be afraid to die? I don't really know. I guess if I really think about it, death is just another thing to experience. It's the final frontier that can't ever really be explored. I guess I would be afraid, but I guess I would also be ready as well.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Answers to questions Part 1
Hey y'all. I found all these questions in a tumblr post and thought I would answer them. I should really be studying for my AP Chemistry exam tomorrow, but who wants to do that? Not me, so I will procrastinate with doing this. There are 102 questions so I will just answer 52 of them now :)
1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
The last person to say I love you to me was my ex. Did I think he meant it? I thought he did, but maybe he didn't
2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
I happen to be 17, so yes.
3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?
Prom.
4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
I do all the time at work. I'm forced to.
5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
I hope not... I don't talk to lots of people so I don't know.
6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
nope, not yet.
7. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Pajamas. My race4kids health volunteer shirt, purple tank top, pink bra, white underpants, black leggings, neon green shorts
8. How often do you listen to music?
Everyday. Music is my savior
9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?
Used to be sweats but now I wear jeans more (even though I prefer skirts)
10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013?
It is 2013.....
11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
antisocial
12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?
Yes.... and I hope to kiss another person whose name begins with the same letter
13. What about ‘R’?
Nope. I've only had 1 kiss
14. Can you drive a stick shift?
hell no
15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?
yeah, even though I think I don't, I really do care.
16. Are you going out of town soon?
yeah, when I go to college
17. When was the last time you cried?
four days ago?
18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?
yes
19. If you could change your eye color, would you?
Yes, my eyes are super dark brown.... i just thought they were black. I want them to be lighter
20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?
Yes, yes there is but he doesn't really know I exist.
21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.
The fact that tomorrow I have an AP Chemistry test to take.
22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?
YES
23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?
ummm.... no, considering I am not a lesbian
24. What are you sitting on right now?
bed
25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?
No.....
26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
Yes, that happens a lot.
27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
My sister
28. Do you get a lot of colds?
I guess. Define a lot?
29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?
Race4Kids Health
30. Does anyone hate you?
Probably
31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?
Nope, I don't drink
32. Do you like watching scary movies?
Nope, unless I get to stare at the guy I like. Then I am semi okay with it.
33. Do you want your tongue pierced?
no
34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
ummm..... The year my relationship ended. I was hurt, very very hurt and now I am broken.
35. Did you have a dream last night?
no
36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
umm.... a long time ago
37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
No.
38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
Honestly? No.
39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Honestly? Nope.
40. Did you have a good day yesterday?
Yes and no for various reasons.
41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?
Nope. stop reminding me.
42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?
Yup
43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
Yes, but he lied.
44. What’s the best part about school?
Off periods
45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
Duh, I am a girl and a girly girl at that.
46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?
I used to.
47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
Yes, yes I do. The good and the bad.
48. Were you single over the last summer?
Yup. Stop it.
49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
Nope, it completely changed.
50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?
Studying, sleeping, anything but doing this.
51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
No. Last phone conversation was with my manager. Last in person conversations were my friend's boyfriend, my crush, and his friends. last facebook conversation was my cousin, so no. I don't hate any of them.
1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
The last person to say I love you to me was my ex. Did I think he meant it? I thought he did, but maybe he didn't
2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
I happen to be 17, so yes.
3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?
Prom.
4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
I do all the time at work. I'm forced to.
5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
I hope not... I don't talk to lots of people so I don't know.
6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
nope, not yet.
7. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Pajamas. My race4kids health volunteer shirt, purple tank top, pink bra, white underpants, black leggings, neon green shorts
8. How often do you listen to music?
Everyday. Music is my savior
9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?
Used to be sweats but now I wear jeans more (even though I prefer skirts)
10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2013?
It is 2013.....
11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
antisocial
12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?
Yes.... and I hope to kiss another person whose name begins with the same letter
13. What about ‘R’?
Nope. I've only had 1 kiss
14. Can you drive a stick shift?
hell no
15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?
yeah, even though I think I don't, I really do care.
16. Are you going out of town soon?
yeah, when I go to college
17. When was the last time you cried?
four days ago?
18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?
yes
19. If you could change your eye color, would you?
Yes, my eyes are super dark brown.... i just thought they were black. I want them to be lighter
20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?
Yes, yes there is but he doesn't really know I exist.
21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.
The fact that tomorrow I have an AP Chemistry test to take.
22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?
YES
23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?
ummm.... no, considering I am not a lesbian
24. What are you sitting on right now?
bed
25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?
No.....
26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
Yes, that happens a lot.
27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
My sister
28. Do you get a lot of colds?
I guess. Define a lot?
29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?
Race4Kids Health
30. Does anyone hate you?
Probably
31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?
Nope, I don't drink
32. Do you like watching scary movies?
Nope, unless I get to stare at the guy I like. Then I am semi okay with it.
33. Do you want your tongue pierced?
no
34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
ummm..... The year my relationship ended. I was hurt, very very hurt and now I am broken.
35. Did you have a dream last night?
no
36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
umm.... a long time ago
37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
No.
38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
Honestly? No.
39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Honestly? Nope.
40. Did you have a good day yesterday?
Yes and no for various reasons.
41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?
Nope. stop reminding me.
42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?
Yup
43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
Yes, but he lied.
44. What’s the best part about school?
Off periods
45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
Duh, I am a girl and a girly girl at that.
46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?
I used to.
47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
Yes, yes I do. The good and the bad.
48. Were you single over the last summer?
Yup. Stop it.
49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
Nope, it completely changed.
50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?
Studying, sleeping, anything but doing this.
51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
No. Last phone conversation was with my manager. Last in person conversations were my friend's boyfriend, my crush, and his friends. last facebook conversation was my cousin, so no. I don't hate any of them.
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Deep Ass Question #3
3. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You have enough time to make ONE phone call. Who do you call? What do you tell them?
Who do I call: It really depends on what point I am at in my life when I am on the plane. The number one person that I would call is my grandma. I love her so much and if I was dying I would want her to know that. Hearing her voice would be the best thing before the plane burst into flames. Even though there is a language barrier, I want to tell her that I love her and she means the world to me.
Who do I call: It really depends on what point I am at in my life when I am on the plane. The number one person that I would call is my grandma. I love her so much and if I was dying I would want her to know that. Hearing her voice would be the best thing before the plane burst into flames. Even though there is a language barrier, I want to tell her that I love her and she means the world to me.
Prom
Hello. I had prom yesterday and it was alright. I really wasn't looking forward to going anyway but it was better than I thought. It's just that....
life kinda sucks right now. I suppose this is the first time I'm going to be super vague about what's going on in my life on this blog. I'll complain about it after I get over just being sad.
I was planning on coming on here and just blogging out my feelings in this blog post but the sadness is just so overwhelming that I don't really feel like blogging about it. I just... I just can't. It just hurts so much.
There is just something painful about seeing your childhood/middle school/a bit of high school crush asking someone else to dance. <-- that's all I am saying right now.
Maybe I'll answer another deep ass question to make up for this lame excuse of a blog post.
life kinda sucks right now. I suppose this is the first time I'm going to be super vague about what's going on in my life on this blog. I'll complain about it after I get over just being sad.
I was planning on coming on here and just blogging out my feelings in this blog post but the sadness is just so overwhelming that I don't really feel like blogging about it. I just... I just can't. It just hurts so much.
There is just something painful about seeing your childhood/middle school/a bit of high school crush asking someone else to dance. <-- that's all I am saying right now.
Maybe I'll answer another deep ass question to make up for this lame excuse of a blog post.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Deep Ass Questions #2
2. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. WHY were you angry? Do you still feel the same way?
Hmmm.... I get really angry a lot but most of the time I keep it inside. The last time I was verbally super duper angry? I would have to say was very very personal. I don't really want to talk about this because I get really ashamed of it. I was just very very very very angry and I almost did things that I would have really regret.
As for at this moment, I am angry. I don't think I will ever be as angry as the time mentioned above, but I am pretty angry right now. I'm angry for a lot of reasons. I'm angry that my mom is an idiot. Today, I donated blood without her permission. Ever since I was 12, I've been signing my own papers because my parents are never home. They go to work in the morning and don't come back until late. I've never really needed to ask for permission since then. Since I am almost 18, I figured that it would be okay and that I would tell her later. I came home today and told her and what do I get? I get yelled at for donating blood. Apparently I can't donate blood because in all the years she's been alive, she hasn't donated yet so why should I have gone and done it without permission. WTF is that logic. It's my blood and if I want to use it to save someone then I can. She has no right to tell me that, especially since I don't even consider her a mother.
I am also mad at myself. I am not one of the best people you'll ever meet. I'm not super skinny. I'm not super smart. I'm not sporty. I'm not anything but average. I am mad at myself for being shy and not taking risks. I'm mad at myself for not knowing what I want in life. I am mad at myself for being a coward.
There are just too many things that I am angry about. Too many things to list. Too many things to talk about in a blog post. There are just too many and that, I have realized, is really sad.
Hmmm.... I get really angry a lot but most of the time I keep it inside. The last time I was verbally super duper angry? I would have to say was very very personal. I don't really want to talk about this because I get really ashamed of it. I was just very very very very angry and I almost did things that I would have really regret.
As for at this moment, I am angry. I don't think I will ever be as angry as the time mentioned above, but I am pretty angry right now. I'm angry for a lot of reasons. I'm angry that my mom is an idiot. Today, I donated blood without her permission. Ever since I was 12, I've been signing my own papers because my parents are never home. They go to work in the morning and don't come back until late. I've never really needed to ask for permission since then. Since I am almost 18, I figured that it would be okay and that I would tell her later. I came home today and told her and what do I get? I get yelled at for donating blood. Apparently I can't donate blood because in all the years she's been alive, she hasn't donated yet so why should I have gone and done it without permission. WTF is that logic. It's my blood and if I want to use it to save someone then I can. She has no right to tell me that, especially since I don't even consider her a mother.
I am also mad at myself. I am not one of the best people you'll ever meet. I'm not super skinny. I'm not super smart. I'm not sporty. I'm not anything but average. I am mad at myself for being shy and not taking risks. I'm mad at myself for not knowing what I want in life. I am mad at myself for being a coward.
There are just too many things that I am angry about. Too many things to list. Too many things to talk about in a blog post. There are just too many and that, I have realized, is really sad.
Monday, April 15, 2013
Deep Question #1
So.... I found this post on tumblr that has 23 deep ass questions as the title. I figured I will answer all of them. It might not be a daily thing, but I will answer all of them.... Eventually.....
1. What is more difficult for you, looking into someones eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they are telling you how they feel?
This question is really hard for me to answer. I rarely tell people how I feel, especially face to face. I can't really remember a time where I really had to explain my feelings face to face with friends. I'm the type of person to avoid confrontation or talking about my feelings or whatever.
I suppose it's more difficult for me to look at someone's eyes when I am telling someone how I feel. When dealing with emotions, I am not good with words. When asked to explain my feelings or give details, my brain shuts down and I stare off into space or down on the ground. I feel that if I look at the person, I will break down and basically flounder around. Maybe that's why I can't talk to the guys that I have liked, that I can't look them in the eye ever. I don't make eye contact with them....
I guess what I am saying is that I am very bad with eye contact. It makes me nervous and I would be uncomfortable with both looking into someones eyes when I are telling someone how I feel and looking into someones eyes when they are telling me how they feel. It's just hard, especially for a socially awkward person like me.
1. What is more difficult for you, looking into someones eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they are telling you how they feel?
This question is really hard for me to answer. I rarely tell people how I feel, especially face to face. I can't really remember a time where I really had to explain my feelings face to face with friends. I'm the type of person to avoid confrontation or talking about my feelings or whatever.
I suppose it's more difficult for me to look at someone's eyes when I am telling someone how I feel. When dealing with emotions, I am not good with words. When asked to explain my feelings or give details, my brain shuts down and I stare off into space or down on the ground. I feel that if I look at the person, I will break down and basically flounder around. Maybe that's why I can't talk to the guys that I have liked, that I can't look them in the eye ever. I don't make eye contact with them....
I guess what I am saying is that I am very bad with eye contact. It makes me nervous and I would be uncomfortable with both looking into someones eyes when I are telling someone how I feel and looking into someones eyes when they are telling me how they feel. It's just hard, especially for a socially awkward person like me.
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